Here we go....

Welcome to The Toborg Family Blog. As Travis heads off to Afghanistan and I tackle life here alone for the upcoming year, I figured this would be the best way to keep everyone up to date on what is going on here with myself and as well as with Travis overseas. So...here we go!

When Travis took his job with Bosh Global in December I have to admit that I was not sure how to take the news that he would be going for a year overseas. I struggled with feelings of guilt and greed of wanting him here with me all while trying to be just as excited as he was for this amazing opportunity to further his aviation career. Needless to say I put away my selfishness and helped him prepare to leave for training in Virginia for a few months. Travis came home the day before Valentine's Day and I can't think of a better gift I could have  received from him! He will be home for a little over a week, he will go to Indiana for a week then go to Afghanistan until about February 2014. I will miss him terribly, but I know that we will be okay and we will survive this year because he have a passion for one another that not even distance can destroy. Our motto for the year will be" Distance means so little when someone means so much." I also know I have a huge support system here with me that will be for me no matter what!

Since Travis is leaving we had to decide what we were going to do about our desire to have children. As some of you know we had an insemination (IUI) in May 2011 that was unsuccessful. Travis was on some medicine for a few months and then he took this job which meant we had to come up with a plan fast if we wanted to make something happen before he left the states. With an increased count and a healthy uterus,Dr. Perloe believed we would be successful if we tried another IUI. So in January we had another IUI which again was unsuccessful. I refuse to go through another failed IUI, so we have decided and are blessed to be able to pursue invitro-fertilization (IVF). This is different from the IUI in the sense that the doctor will physically extract my eggs and inject them with Travis' sperm. They will put them in a dish and watch the egg fertilize for a few days and them transfer the embryo into my uterus in hopes that it will latch on and develop into a successful pregnancy. With this process comes lots of money, doctors visits, medicines, injections, and even more emotions. We went this past Friday for my baseline appointment and was supposed to begin injections, but we've hit a bump. I have a cyst on my right ovary that has developed which Dr. Perloe believes is from the unsuccessful IUI in January. I am now on some medication three times a day to help shrink the cyst so we can begin the IVF process. I go back this Friday to see if the medication worked. My nurse is fully confident that this medication will work and that this is just a small bump in the road.

With all these bumps and unsuccessful IUI procedures, I still know that I am destined to have children of my own. I know God has planned that for me. This whole process has tested my faith on so many different levels. I have struggled with finding peace in the things I cannot control, with this fertility issue being number one. I have learned I must put my faith in God and know that He will provide for me in His own timing. I am such a control freak and it's been  the hardest thing to let go and let God throughout this whole process. I know in order for this desire of my heart to become a reality I must let go....and let God do His work.

Until next time....